


Cut and Dry

by GraceMac



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-05
Updated: 2013-12-05
Packaged: 2018-01-03 13:03:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1070772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GraceMac/pseuds/GraceMac
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>||Takes place directly after the ending of Season 8.||<br/>“I can’t do this anymore Dean.” His gravely voice was hoarse from sleep or having been crying for the past two hours Dean had no idea. But the thought of him crying and Dean not doing anything about it left a sour feeling settle in his stomach.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cut and Dry

The wind was beating against the window along with the pelting of rain drops. Even the scratching of a branch against the glass could be heard faintly. But it was enough to make Castiel twitch under the covers of the motel suite the men were sharing.

Sam was in his own room now because the last time he was in the room with Cas the poor ex-angel kept him up half the night with his tossing and turning. The youngest Winchester felt for him. He knew what it was like to feel like everything was out to get you and that there was nothing you could do because you were powerless. But enough was enough. It had been three days and he just couldn’t do it anymore. He was on the mend from the trials and Dean was perfectly healthy so why couldn’t he take care of the newly born human angel? Besides, wasn’t Castiel Dean’s angel anyway? So he put his foot down and told Dean he would be getting a separate room for the duration it took for them to get back to the bunker. Between Sam still under the weather and Cas being newly human it felt like they were never going to get back ‘home’.

Now the wind was howling. Cas let out a small puffing noise and he squeezed his eyes shut. His fingers twitched where they clinched the blanket tight in balled up fists. He shifted which made the bed squeak, to bury his face into the pillow. All the while Dean watched from his own bed. He had rolled to his side when he heard the shifting begin and that was over two hours ago.

Dean wasn’t sure if he said something but he thought he heard a mumble.

This was crazy. This had to stop.

He threw his blankets off of himself and swung his legs over the side of the bed in one fluid motion. He smirked at the fact that he could still do that even at the age he was and the life style he led. But now was not the time to take pride in something so trivial.

It only took a few steps to bring him to the side of the other bed. Its occupant still twitching under the blankets.

“Cas.” Dean said softly.

The last thing they both needed was for the man to scream from his voice being too loud. The last time that happened the poor man actually peed his pants. It was embarrassing for everyone but more so for Castiel obviously. He had no idea how to control anything about his new body.

Castiel didn’t move.

Dean ran a hand over his face and groaned quietly. ‘Why does this always have to be me?’

He sat down as gingerly as he could on the side of the bed. But even that small movement made Cas turn swiftly. His right hand went under the pillow and brought up a small dagger into the air, aiming right for Dean’s throat.

Dean grabbed his friend’s wrist and held his arm. “Cas! Its just me!” But the man struggled. “Dammit Cas stop this. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Once he realized who Dean was he broke down. Cas hung his head and his arm went limp in Dean’s grip. His shoulders shook as it sounded almost like he was crying.

Oh God.

Every annoyance Dean had felt since the beginning of the night drained away at the muffled noises—sobs coming from the man seated next to him.

With much care the hunter took the dagger from his companion and leaned over to place it on the night stand.

“I can’t do this anymore Dean.” His gravely voice was hoarse from sleep or having been crying for the past two hours Dean had no idea. But the thought of him crying and Dean not doing anything about it left a sour feeling settle in his stomach.

“You’re doing fine.” He said quietly. As much as Dean wanted to be angry he couldn’t. He wanted to scream at him and just tell him to ‘suck it up’ because when it came down to it the whole ordeal started with the leviathans and it was his fault. But he couldn’t. Because Cas always had the best of intentions. How could he be angry about that?

Cas looked up at him with a dead pan look on his exhausted face. “I drank the mouth wash and regurgitated it into the toilet later.”

Leave it to Cas to say ‘regurgitate’ instead of simply saying he ‘threw it up’. And Dean tried his hardest, he really did to NOT roll his eyes but when it came to Cas he just couldn’t help it.

As soon as the ex-angel saw the eye roll he let out a chocked noise and stood up. “I don’t need you making light of my situation Dean.” He swallowed. “I can go sleep in the car if that is more to your liking.”

Again Dean felt like shit. He reached out and grabbed the other mans arm. “Don’t be like that Cas.” He gave a slight tug urging him to sit back down. Reluctantly Cas sat down the edge of the bed. Again Dean had to urge him to turn towards him since he would not look at him.

“Emotions make us cry and laugh.”

“Its not that cut and dry Dean. Even I know that.” Cas fumbled on the night stand for the tissues. Once he pulled a few out he folded them before blowing his nose

Dean watched this process and smiled.

As soon as Cas was done he saw Dean looking at him and he blinked “What?”

“You’re doing fine Cas. Look you’ve even gotten down blowing your nose.”

“Well I wouldn't want to leave the stuff in my nose. And besides if I just left it there it starts to slide down and into my mouth.” He made a face.

Dean broke out into a laugh. It earned a glare from Cas.

What happened next Dean never expected.

“I.. I..” Cas stood up once again. “I’ve lost everything. My family is scattered and they hate me. You at least have always had Sam. I don’t need you laughing at me. Do you know how hard this is for me? Do you Dean? DO YOU?” He screamed. His body was shaking and then his eyes went wide. He brought a hand to his chest and clutched at it.

The hunter got up and lunged at him. He brought him down onto the bed and into his lap side ways. It was something he did so many times for Sam when he was younger. When he first started hunting and couldn’t get over the adrenaline. Dean would hold him in his arms and rock him until it faded. The anxiety of the situation was too much for Cas to handle alone.

“Calm down.” He rubbed his back. “Breath slowly. In and out. In and out.”

Cas buried his face into Dean’s neck. “I can’t do this Dean. I can’t do it. Its too much.”

For a few moments Dean was quiet. He let Cas let out the tears, the sobs he was choking on. He let he man cling to him like he was drowning and Dean was the life raft.

“You have us.” He ran a hand through Cas’s dark hair. “You have Sammy and I. And we will never disown you or kick you out Cas.” He rocked him some more and added. “You’ve got me.”

It took a bit of time but the wallowing soon ebbed. And Dean was left with a lapful of a sleeping ex-angel that was currently drooling on his shoulder and neck.

“I need you. I’ve always needed you. But right now you need me more.” Dean said softly in a room that was echoing the deep breathing of a man that Dean suddenly realized meant just as much as Sam ever would.


End file.
